Our entire lives are spent seeking out comforts.  The familiar plays on a misguided notion of safety.  The devil you know is better than the devil that you don’t know, right?

Not necessarily.  When you are too comfortable, it means you are probably not trying hard enough.  You have gotten to the point where you are “good enough”.  But good enough is not great, outstanding or groundbreaking.  Good enough walks on a treadmill, instead of blazing a new path.  Good enough doesn’t encourage progress. Good enough doesn’t change the world.

When you are uncomfortable, you are pushing boundaries.  You are trying new things.  You are willing to fail and fail big.  This is where amazing personal and professional shifts come from.

• In your workouts, being physically uncomfortable is where you gain increased strength, speed and agility;
• In your relationships, being vulnerable and uncomfortable is where you create true bonds with others;
• In your career or business, taking uncomfortable risks or doing work outside of your “comfort zone” is where you can advance yourself to the next level.

Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

Comfort equals accepting the status quo.  If you don’t aspire to anything more, then go ahead and be comfortable. Uncomfortable leads to growth.  It’s scary and may be painful, but pain is temporary.  Your achievements are forever.

I never considered myself a fearful person.  But since having my first child in 2008, things have changed a little in this respect.  My son Jonah, you see, was born premature and had a host of health concerns in the beginning.  Scary propositions like fever-induced seizures and extra pockets of fluid in his brain dogged us for the better part of his first two years.

Now, I find myself anxious that Jonah’s going to get sick, because if he gets a fever, he might have a seizure.  Legitimate as this concern may be, as it has begun to interfere with our quality of life (e.g. I don’t want to take him to the children’s museum in the winter), it is time to do something about it.  Here are some suggestions I’ve been given to cope with my fear.

Imagine the worst that could happen

I envision the worst case scenario and prepare myself to cope should take scenario come to fruition.  Let’s say that Jonah does get sick and has a seizure as the result of a fever.  The seizure is frightening to watch, but it will not harm him.  I have been through this before and now understand the best way to handle the situation.

Use affirmations

On my office wall, I have placed a sticky note that says, “Toddler illness is natural and not the end of the world.”  When I get really nervous, I repeat to myself that Jonah is basically a healthy child and is developing well, and it is good for his immune system to get sick from time to time.

Visualize facing the fear

In my mind’s eye, I picture caring for Jonah while he is sick.  I see myself giving him Tylenol and lots of affection, and taking him to the doctor.  I watch myself doing what needs to be done, and I note that that those things are not as bad as I imagined they would be.

What do you think?  How do you overcome your fears, either in business or in life?

Do you find yourself needing to mentally reboot throughout the work week?

Do you find yourself often wondering how to shake off negative energy, negative thoughts, negative influences?

If so, here’s an exercise to try.

First, go through your music collection and find music that you know changes your mood for the better. For now, just make a list.

From this list of music that you know changes your mood for the better, look for songs with the following characteristics:

• A strong rhythm or beat
• A wide spectrum (lots of bass, mid, and treble)
• If it has lyrics, the lyrics should use words and imagery that is not only positive, but that you can happily sing along to
• A strong positive emotional association with successes in the past

To do this exercise, you’ll also need a place where you can use your voice without fear of embarrassment, as well as a place where you can listen to the music with your entire body (not using headphones/earphones). Ideally, this is a place you can use at nearly any time and requires little or no preparation. For most people, a car is probably the most convenient spot meeting these criteria.

Once you’ve gathered the pre-requisite music and location, arrange your playlist in order of time you have available and in increasing intensity (songs that make you happy). For the average 18 minute commute, you can pack 4-6 songs in. If your commute is longer, you can add more or longer music; for people with no commute, a 15 minute break away from your workspace is probably enough.

Play the music at a volume where you feel deep bass notes in your body. It doesn’t have to be ear-achingly loud, but it does need to be perceivable as a physical sensation, even a minor one. Then sing along, as loudly as you can, to your favorite music.

A few key elements make this different than just listening to good music. Sound waves are energy, and as a result, being able to feel them in your body (instead of just your ears) can help you energize all of yourself. Nothing mystical or mysterious here; anyone who’s been to a rock concert knows that sound you feel with your whole body is that much more impactful.

Second, singing along is one of the best ways to get yourself to take deeper breaths and use your lung capacity. When you sing along loudly, you also naturally have to adjust and align your spine.

Finally, of course, participating in music you love does much more to cheer you up and change your mood than passively listening. It’s very difficult to focus on belting out lyrics and still be brooding on the day’s troubles.

Try it out and see how it works for you!

I’m fascinated by the intersection between thinking, creativity and movement.

Back when I studied for the bar (many moons ago), I spent the entire time walking.

Whenever I’m on a call with a client or doing a phone interview, I pace mercilessly.

When I speak, I’m pretty sure I cover every available inch of the stage.

Seats, podiums, constraints of any kind, when in thinking and creating mode, kill me. They don’t just make me feel uncomfortable, they change how I think, how I create, how I solve.

But, there are times when I need to sit and create. For hours at a time. Like right now, as I work on my next book.

And, even when I do sit and write, I’ve always felt that the simple fact that I move a lot outside my creative practice helps me channel my juices.

Haruki Murakami in The Paris Review, Summer 2004 shared:

When I’m in writing mode for a novel, I get up at 4:00 am and work for five to six hours. In the afternoon, I run for 10km or swim for 1500m (or do both), then I read a bit and listen to some music. I go to bed at 9:00 pm. I keep to this routine every day without variation. The repetition itself becomes the important thing; it’s a form of mesmerism. I mesmerize myself to reach a deeper state of mind. But to hold to such repetition for so long — six months to a year — requires a good amount of mental and physical strength. In that sense, writing a long novel is like survival training. Physical strength is as necessary as artistic sensitivity.

That resonates so strongly with me. When you’re writing something really substantial, at least for me, once I’ve done enough research to stop circling, the deeper creative process does take me into a place that takes a serious amount of energy, mental and physical, over a sustained period of time.

And, I’m pretty sure that’s not just about writing. It’s about creating anything worth creating. It takes a toll, requires you to draw upon reservoirs you may not have even known existed.

So, whatever your vision, be it artistic, personal, spiritual, entrepreneurial, explore the impact of a dedicated movement practice as a source of fortification for the quest.

It can be quite an extraordinary catalyst to the process.

One of my favorite fitness gurus is Tony Horton (of P90x fame); he delivers great motivation tempered with sanity (and sometimes insanity).  One of my favorite Tony-isms is, “Do your best and forget the rest”.

Those are wise words that I try to heed when the going gets tough.  However, someone that I respect called me out on my own statement of “doing my best” a couple of years back.

I was trying to find a resource related to a business deal and had done some fairly extensive research on the subject.  When I talked to this colleague about it, I told him that I hadn’t found the answer that I was seeking, but that I had done “my best”.

There was silence on his side for a few seconds.

It registered with me in that moment. Sure, I had tried hard, but had I really done my best?  Had I really reached out to my full network; had I really not left any stone unturned?  Had I really given 100% effort to this important task?

I changed my answer.  “Well, maybe I haven’t done my best, but I did put forth a good effort”.  In my own mind, I laughed at how silly (and hypocritical, given my general life philosophy) that was.

Ever since then, I have had a heightened awareness about people claiming to have done their best.  I hear it in regards to entrepreneurs working through sticky business situations, friends struggling with diets and all kinds of individuals trying to reach goals that say that they have given “their best” when, in actuality, they just have put forth a decent effort.

If you have an exercise goal, are you really pushing your strength and cardio to the limit?  Do you do that last push-up until you collapse on the floor? Or does your head stop you before you body really does?

If you have a business goal, have you really used every possible resource available?

If you have a problem, have you really asked everyone in your network for help?

That extra bit of effort between good and your all is what will lead you to progress.

Be in tune with what it means to do your best.  As Tony Horton also says, “If you do your best, it is always enough”.  But you need to legitimately give your best for that to be true.  Don’t stop yourself short when you can really get to the next level.